Seven Ways to Avoid Grounds for Divorce without Marital Therapy

In this day and age the term "grounds for divorce" has become somewhat passe. In most states all you need to do to get a divorce is file as "irreconcilable differences." But most people who get a divorce only get one because they don't know what else to do. The resources that most people are exposed to for helping their troubled marriage are simply inadequate because marriage is not understood.

Despite all of the training given to those who are licensed in the field of marital therapy nobody taught them the fundamental foundational principles of marriage or what it takes to make a marriage successful. Licensed counselors are generally trained with Freudian methods of psychotherapy and also they are trained to test personalities. Even the success rate of marriage within their own field is the same as the general population.

One would think that a shoemaker would walk around in shoes that are well taken care of, because the shoemaker understands shoes. Likewise, a marital therapist ought to know very well what makes a marriage work and what makes a marriage collapse. But they don't, and often suggest to their clients grounds for divorce, because they don't know what else to say that can help them.

Troubled Marriages can be Helped at Nearly Every Stage

This simple reality is that there are simple fixes to what appear to be complex marital problems. Marital therapy is like an evil hoax because it offers promises it cannot keep. Those who are suffering in marriage are truly suffering. A couple of very good people are in a position they never imagined they would find themselves in.

People don't realize when they get married how much they need to learn about what they are getting into so they can become successful. The difference between a successful marriage and a failing marriage is never the difference between good and bad people. The difference between a successful marriage and a failing marriage is the difference between knowing what you're doing and not knowing what you're doing.

It is almost criminal that the basic needs of every single person in our country are not being addressed by our school systems or professionals. Our schools emphasize educating everyone with classes on mathematics but offer nothing in the how to live areas of communication and relationships. Once an individual or couple knows what a marriage is and what is required to make it function, they are more than happy to shift their behavior for the sake of their family. Even couples on the brink of divorce can restart their lives, leave their past mistakes behind and have a highly successful, joyous marriage.

Seven things you can do to avoid grounds for divorce without marital therapy:

1. Ask yourself if you are an ideal spouse, and if you are not, now is the time to become one regardless of your spouse's behaviors
2. Treat your spouse with the utmost respect regardless of how they treat you
3. List your spouse's positive qualities and remind yourself of them often
4. Tell your spouse how much you admire them for their higher qualities
5. Refuse to entertain negative thoughts about your spouse
6. Praise your spouse to other people
7. Tell your spouse you love them and fight your bad habits that tell you the love is not there anymore

And prove yourself without being concerned about how your spouse is doing in fighting their own bad habits. Remember that you are responsible for your behavior regardless of how you are treated.